Get a Grip
A good, firm handshake was very important to my father.
“You have to look a man in the eye, grip his hand, and give it a firm shake. Give him a taste of your character.”
He came from a generation where a man would be judged by his handshake. A firm handshake with good eye contact, according to my father, said a lot about a man. It said he was confident, secure, strong, assertive and bold.
In light of this, I was taught how to shake hands. I was taught that shaking hands with a woman was different than shaking hands with a man. A handshake with a woman was supposed to be gently and kinder, though not weak. Your objective with a woman was not to assert dominance, but to communicate care and connection.
However, the objective when shaking the hand of another man was to let him know you weren’t a pushover. You had to give him a little sense of your strength – of character and physical strength. But don’t try to crush his hand. If you do this you’ll come across as someone trying too hard. No, a simple, casual, strong, intentional grip with a little shake and 3 seconds of eye contact gets the message across.
I was taught to despise a weak handshake. You know the kind, when a man’s handshake is like shaking a dead fish. It’s limp and devoid of life.
“Seriously, is that the best you can do?”
I wonder if this philosophy of handshakes is where the phrase, “Get a grip!” comes from.
I’m sure you’ve heard someone say to you at some point in time, “Get a grip.” It typically means that you need to get your facts straight, or calm down and “get a hold of yourself”. Basically it can mean 2 things: get your emotions under control, or to understand how to deal with something.
We can get a grip on things, and things can get a grip on us.
We can be gripped by fear, or anxiety, or jealousy, or greed, or lust, or any manner of negative emotions and influences. Or, we can be gripped by any number of positive emotions and influences: in the grip of grace, gripped by compassion, or love, or righteous indignation, or conviction, or the like.
I believe what we get a grip on determines what gets a grip on us.
I was visiting a church in Ottawa recently. This is their mission:
“To make disciples of Jesus, gripped by the Gospel, living for God’s glory.”
That particular phrase, “Gripped by the Gospel” leapt out at me…
Hmmm, what am I gripped by? What do I have a grip on?
The only way we can be gripped by the Gospel is if we have a grip on the Gospel. We need to have a grip on Jesus and His Word if we are to have any hope of having the Gospel get a grip on us.
So what do you have a grip on? Do you have a grip on the things of this world? Do you have a grip on self-preservation? Do you have a grip on yourself and your own self-interests and desires?
What we have a grip on has a grip on us.
Are you willing to let go of everything except Jesus and His “Gospel” – His Good News, His Truth? Or are there things you want to hold onto, things you’re unwilling to surrender to God? Whatever we hold onto has a hold on us.
Let’s get a grip on Jesus.
But may that grip not be like a handshake. No, the kind of grip I think we need on Jesus is more like that of someone who is falling over a cliff and in a desperate, wholehearted, last ditch attempt to avoid falling to our death, we have reached out and gripped the hand of someone of the strength and stature to not only stop us from falling, but who can also pull us up to safety.
Let’s grip Jesus and His Word like our life depended upon it. Because in reality, it does.
When we grip Him, He grips us.
Get a grip!
Philippians 3:12
“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.”
2 Thessalonians 2:15 (The Message)
“So, friends, take a firm stand, feet on the ground and head high. Keep a tight grip on what you were taught, whether in personal conversation or by our letter.”
1 Timothy 1:19 (The Message)
“There are some, you know, who by relaxing their grip and thinking anything goes have made a thorough mess of their faith.”
Hebrews 10:23 (The Message)
“Let’s keep a firm grip on the promises that keep us going. He always keeps his word.”
Entertaining Thoughts
How much do you entertain guests?
For some people entertaining is an art. Their ability to make people feel at home, as well as feel like special guests, is amazing. I know some people who always seem to be entertaining. Their home has a revolving door of guests.
Entertaining can take on myriad forms. Some people are more comfortable with hosting smaller more intimate gatherings of people – perhaps another couple or two at the most. Other people seem to believe “the more the merrier” is the order of the day and, therefore, their gatherings are more like large scale parties.
There are often a number of key components to any entertaining: good people, good food, good beverages, good conversation, good music, and good décor often combine for good times. You can feel the energy upon arriving at a gathering when the host opens the door, you hear the music and the cacophony of lively laughter and conversations taking place, smell the delightful aromas of delicious food and beverages, and begin to drink in the visual array of special lights, candles and decorations that may adorn the house.
I believe great entertaining is all about “blessing” people and not about “impressing” people. Sadly, for some people entertaining is more about trying to impress people than simply about caring for and enjoying people. We can entertain people for a variety of reasons – some that bear good fruit, and some that bear bad fruit.
Entertaining is simply about hosting guests in a delightful and delicious way. It’s about spending time with and taking care of people.
In the same way we entertain people we also entertain thoughts. In fact, we are far more prolific and generous entertainers of thought than we are entertainers of people. Every waking moment of every day we are entertaining thoughts.
I believe we are, and we become, what we think on. Our thoughts influence and determine what we believe, and what we believe determines how we do life.
“Metacognition” is an understanding and awareness of what you think about. It’s really thinking about your thinking, or being aware of your thoughts. Metacognition is critically important for us to be able to make the appropriate thought choices to believe the Truth and not be ensnared by lies.
How are your metacognition skills? Are you aware of the kind of thoughts you entertain?
Jesus asked some Pharisees an interesting question, “Why do you entertain evil thoughts in your hearts?
So what constitutes “evil thoughts”?
I would like to suggest that an evil thought is any thought that doesn’t align with the truth. Any thoughts that don’t align with the heart of God are evil thoughts. That could be thoughts of lust, jealousy, revenge, resentment, bitterness, hatred and unforgiveness, as well as thoughts of discouragement, despair and loneliness – including thoughts about your own lack of worth, or about God’s lack of interest, and love for you.
We have to be aware of when we’re entertaining these kinds of “evil thoughts” and kick them out of our minds. Those are not the kinds of guests we want roaming around our hearts and minds.
Would you keep entertaining guests in your home who started trashing the place? Absolutely not! If guests you were entertaining started throwing garbage around, smashing treasured possessions and generally causing havoc you would get them out of the house ASAP – perhaps even calling on the authority of the police to evict them!
We need to have the same attitude toward the thoughts we entertain. We need to be aware when we begin to entertain “evil thoughts” that are trashing our peace, hope, faith, strength, encouragement, commitment, care and the like, and kick them out – stop entertaining them!
We need to be very discerning in regard to the kind of thoughts we entertain. Whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy is what we need to be thinking about. We have authority over what we think about. We need to be aware of what thoughts we’re entertaining and kick them out if they’re not in line with the truth.
Let’s think about our thoughts and ensure we are entertaining good thoughts.
What thoughts are you entertaining?
Matthew 9:4
“Knowing their thoughts, Jesus said, ‘Why do you entertain evil thoughts in your hearts?’”
Philippians 4:8
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
2 Corinthians 10:5
“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
Hebrews 4:12
“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”
The Company You Keep
You eat fat greasy food and you become a fat greasy dude.
I think we all know the adage, “You are what you eat.” Whatever we put in our bodies we will somehow see the effects of in our bodies. This is true for what we eat and drink, but I believe it is true for the kind of company we keep as well.
I remember as a little boy there was a particular uncle whom I did not really like being around. He was mean-spirited and drank excessively. He tended to be sarcastic, harsh and unkind. His humor was often at the expense of others – he was a bit of a social bully.
However, what I disliked the most about visiting him was the effect he had on my father. I noticed than when my father was with him, my father often became more like him. My dad tended to drink more and became less kind and more sarcastic. Even as a young boy I remember wondering why my dad let my uncle influence him in this way.
When my dad kept the company of my uncle he became like him. My dad allowed himself to be influenced by my uncle in a negative way.
Have you ever experienced that? Have you been around people who tended to bring the worst out of you? How about the corollary – have you been around people who brought the best out in you?
I am motivated when I am in the company of men and women who are passionate, committed followers of Jesus, who are wholeheartedly pursuing God’s purposes for them and for others through them. They are laying their lives down for God’s Kingdom. Wow – they cause me to up my game. I want to become like them. They encourage me to be my best.
The people whose company we keep matters. Studies have indicated that a young person’s peer group has a very significant influence on who they become as adults. We can have friend groups that provide negative peer pressure, or positive peer pressure.
“Don not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” 1 Corinthians 15:33
Paul didn’t pull any punches when he talked about the influence of our peers. Basically he is saying that we become the company we keep.
What kind of influence do your friends have on you? Do they encourage you to be your best? Or, do they somehow influence you to sink to the lowest common denominator? I would encourage you to surround yourself with friends who help you to be your best – who inspire you to set high standards for yourself.
Choose your friends well.
There is another aspect to this truth though. We can keep the company of many people in many different forums. We keep the company of people through TV, through movies, through music, through videos, through all sorts of media. I have realized that often I let the wrong company influence me through the television or the internet.
Have you ever sat through a particular TV show, while you were just “vegging”, and you watched something that was not calling out the best in you, but was actually dragging you down to a standard you were not happy with? I know I have.
In fact, if we are honest with ourselves, most of what we watch on TV would often fall into the “bad company” exhortation Paul gave us. I think it would behoove us to more closely scrutinize the media we expose ourselves to through the lens of “the company we keep”.
If bad company corrupts good character, then we would be wise to evaluate the company we keep on TV, and on the internet. Sure, we understand the ills of pornography. But, look at what is on TV every night in popular shows through the lens of 1 Corinthians 15:33 and we certainly become far more discerning in what we watch.
The company we keep matters. And the company we keep through media certainly influences us as well – for better or for worse.
Choose wisely. Let’s choose the company that encourages and empowers us to be our best.
Proverbs 22:24, 25
“Do not associate with a man given to anger; or go with a hot-tempered man, or you will learn his ways and find a snare for yourself.”
Proverbs 13:20
“He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.”
Psalm 1:1-3
“How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stand in the path of sinners, nor sit in the seat of scoffers! But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law he meditates day and night. He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in its season and its leaf does not wither; and in whatever he does, he prospers.”
Proverbs 4:23
“Above all else guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”
Hidden Treasure
The seas were raging. The anger of the ocean was overwhelming. This would be their end.
All was lost.
They had tried to outrun the hurricane, but there was no escaping its deadly embrace. They dropped anchor in the shallow waters off the Florida Keys in an attempt to keep the ship off the rocks, but it was no use. The relentless assault of the waves and wind did their worst and she sunk.
The Nuestra Señora de Atocha was a very significant ship in the Spanish fleet. She was carrying half a billion dollars of gold, silver and jewels. But all her wealth could not save her. Her riches were scattered across the ocean floor in 55 feet of water on September 6th, 1622.
For over 60 years the Spanish searched for the treasure, but it was not to be found. For hundreds of years it lay hidden in the depths, slowly being further hidden by the shifting sands of time and all manner of organic and inorganic matter. Many had tried to find the treasure over the centuries, but none had succeeded.
Then in 1969, at 47 years of age, an optimistic treasure hunter named Mel Fisher took up the quest to find the riches of the Atocha. He dedicated his life to finding this wildly valuable hidden treasure. He found just enough treasure over the years to continue funding his quest.
For 16 years he gave himself wholeheartedly to uncover the riches the sea had buried. He persevered through all manner of storms and setbacks. He fought and won over 100 court battles. He spent millions. He engaged investors to help provide the resources to continue his search. He lost his own ship to a storm; sadly, his son and daughter in law were lost as well.
Though Mel was buffeted by all manner of resistance – financial, emotional, physical, and legal – he never gave up. He continued to move forward in the face of opposition. He was continuously optimistic in spite of disappointment after disappointment. He would get up every day and declare,
“Today is the day!”
For 16 years, over 5840 times, he declared, “Today is the day!”, until 1985 when he and his team finally discovered the $450 million dollar treasure cache or “Atocha Mother Lode”. Over 40 tons of silver and gold were located including over 100,000 Spanish silver coins known as “Pieces of Eight”, gold coins, Columbian emeralds, silver and gold artifacts and over 1000 silver bars.
After 16 years of optimistic perseverance July 20, 1985 was the day. At the age of 63 he found a treasure of unfathomable value. He had demonstrated commitment to his quest unlike any other undersea treasure hunter of his generation, and he was richly rewarded for his efforts.
Scripture tells us something about treasure. We are encouraged not to seek the treasures of this world, but to store up treasures in heaven – to seek everlasting riches. We are also encouraged to pursue the Kingdom of God like a field filled with buried treasure. Jesus said that we should sell all we have to obtain the riches of the Kingdom.
King Solomon exhorted his son to seek wisdom, understanding and insight like it was hidden treasure. He considered wisdom to be true wealth, as it leads to the knowledge of God.
I don’t know about you, but I am not as passionate about finding hidden treasure as Mel Fisher was. I am referring to true treasure: the riches of the Kingdom. I want to have the same kind of optimism, perseverance and reckless abandonment toward seeking the true riches of the Kingdom that Mel Fisher had toward the riches of this world.
I think the greatest treasure of the Kingdom is God Himself. If we seek Him we will find Him if we seek Him wholeheartedly. And with the discovery of God Himself we obtain all that is in His heart toward us – His Kingdom. Righteousness, peace, joy, faith, hope, strength, healing, wisdom, understanding, discernment, and myriad other valuables to enrichen our lives.
However, the true riches of the Kingdom take effort to discover. We must seek first His Kingdom like buried treasure.
The hidden treasure of the Kingdom is worth our very best effort.
Matthew 13:44
“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.”
Proverbs 2:1-5
“My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding— indeed, if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.”
Matthew 6:19-21
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
Proverbs 25:2
“It is the glory of God to conceal a matter; to search out a matter is the glory of kings.”